Two Months Without You, Ali, Valentine’s Day Without My Forever Valentine

Two months without you… sixty days that feel both endless and like a blur. It still doesn’t feel real that you’re gone. But today isn’t just another day without you… it’s Valentine’s Day. Our first one apart. I keep thinking about the way you made this day feel special, not with over-the-top gestures, but with the little things that linger in my heart… your handwritten notes that always knew exactly what to say, our inside jokes that no one else would ever understand, and that smile of yours… God, that smile could brighten even the heaviest days.

Last night, Liam went to his first Valentine’s Day dance, and I had the honor of taking him. Watching him light up with excitement, ready to run wild with his friends, filled me with so much pride. I kept thinking about how much you would have loved every second of it. You would have been right there, camera in hand, snapping a million pictures, telling him how handsome he looked, and laughing at his goofy dance moves. He was the perfect mix of nervous and thrilled, and I know you were with us, smiling as he danced the night away. He’s so resilient, Ali… just like you taught him to be.

And today, I kept our tradition alive… I went to McDonald’s for Valentine’s Day, just like we’ve done every year since 2006. I can still see us that first year… me panicking because I forgot to make reservations, driving from place to place, and you, calm as ever, smiling and saying, “McDonald’s is perfectly fine.” There we were, all dressed up, sharing fries and laughing at how ridiculous but perfect it all felt. That simple moment became our tradition, our thing. Sitting there without you today was hard, harder than I can put into words, but it also felt like the only place I could be. I could almost hear your laugh, teasing me about our “fancy” Valentine’s dinner, and for a moment, it felt like you were right there with me.

Avalynn, Liam, and I spent the evening at Brittney and Mike’s with Sloan and Witten. The house was full of laughter, chaos, and so much love. Brittney and Mike, as always, outdid themselves with an incredible spread of snacks, and the kids ran around like they didn’t have a care in the world. Watching them play, hearing their giggles echo through the house, and feeling the warmth of friends who’ve become family was a much-needed reminder that joy still exists, even when it feels out of reach. I know you would have loved seeing Avalynn and Liam so carefree, so happy… even if just for a little while. Moments like that feel like tiny pieces of light in all this darkness.

We’re still here, Ali… holding on, moving forward, and carrying you with us in everything we do. Your love is still our anchor, our guide, and our comfort. Even now, it surrounds us, reminding me that love like ours doesn’t end… it just changes shape.

Forever was never going to be long enough with you… but it’s what I promised, and I’ll keep that promise for the rest of my days.

I love you, Ali. Always. Happy Valentine’s Day.